Episode 23

Airport Announcer: Flight 225 arriving from Connecticut is now landing.

<We see the door of the terminal open and Jessica comes out, followed by Mallu and Chester, who seem to be in an argument. Burt comes out last.>

Chester: Mallu, you idiot. I'll carry her luggage.

Mallu: No you won't. I will.

Chester: She's MY wife.

Mallu: EX-Wife.

Chester: Not for long she isn't.

Mallu: Over my dead body you'll marry her again.

Chester: That shouldn't be too hard..

<Chester jumps on Mallu and they start fighting.>

Jessica: Boys! Boys!! No no....Please stop....Burt, do something.

Burt: Hey! Chester! Mallu! Stop!

<Chester and Mallu ignore Burt and keep fighting.>

Burt: I guess they won't listen to me.

Jessica: I see....

Burt: Chester....Look, a hot chick!

<Chester gets off Mallu.>

Chester: Where? Where?

Burt: Gotcha!

<The audience claps>

Jessica: Now, now. You can each carry one piece of my luggage.

Mallu: You mean we share the burden?

Jessica: Yes.

Mallu: Wow...what an idea. I'm surprised I didn't think of that.

Chester: I'm not.

<Mallu tries jumping on Chester, but before he can, Jessica puts a suitcase in front of him.>

Jessica: Now, E. Ronald, you carry this suitcase. And Chester, you can carry the other.

Chester: OK.

<Chester and Mallu pick up the luggage and drop it immediately, as it's too heavy.>

Jessica: Now, boys, if you can't carry the luggage, you're going to have to exercise.

Chester: So, anyway, Burt, where do we start?

Burt: Start what?

Chester: Start looking for Corinne and Eunice, what else?

Burt: Oh, that...Well, I figured that I'll go and pay Dutch a visit in jail and see what he knows.

Jessica: Oh, that's a good idea.

Burt: And the meantime the three of you can do something else to help.

Jessica: Are you crazy? I'm going shopping. I've just got to get myself one of those really funky hats that Texans always wear...What are they called again?

Burt: Cowboy hats?

Jessica: That's it! So, Burt, see you later at the hotel. Tell Dutch I say hi.

<Jessica starts walking away but stops halfway.>

Jessica: Chester, E. Ronald, aren't you going to come along?

Chester: What for, Jess?

Jessica: Well, I'm going to need someone to carry my shopping bags for me.

<Chester and Mallu jump up, but they bump into each other and fall.>

Mallu: Watch out, Tate.

Chester: No, you watch out.

Mallu: Oh, shut up and come along with me.

Chester: You're inviting me to come?

Mallu: Well, yeah. I just know I won't be able to carry all those bags on my own. Let's go.

<Mallu, Chester, and Jessica leave. Burt stays behind. At first he shakes his head, but then smiles and walks away.>

Billy: How long can it take? She's been in the operating room for hours.

Danny: Now come on, Billy. I've had surgery before. It's very complicated.

Billy: Really? What happens?

Danny: Well...I don't remember....But, it does take hours.

Billy: Oh.

Danny: Yeah. I remember one time that....oh never mind. That wasn't surgery. That was when I jumped off the roof.

Billy: OK....Danny, why are you here?

Danny: Well, I'm here because....because....that's a good question. Why am I here?

Billy: I'm sure it has something to do with your new job as deputy.

Danny: Right. I'm here for the official police investigation into Leslie's shooting.

Billy: Right. Why don't I just tell you what happened?

Danny: Well, we have to hear Leslie's side of the story.

Billy: Why?

Danny: Well...because...because...gee, I have no idea.

<The door opens and Dr. Barnes comes out.>

Billy: Oh, Doctor, thank god. How's it going?

Dr. Barnes: Well, the surgery is finished.

Billy: And?

Dr. Barnes: Well, we've done all we could...but she will be paralyzed.

Billy: Oh my god...

Dr. Barnes: I'm sorry. If you'd like to you can go in and see her, she's awake.

Billy: Thanks. I will.

Danny: Doc, I'm really glad you're here. You see, I've been having some medical trouble lately.

Dr. Barnes: What's the problem?

Danny: Well, I seem to be having problems with my foot. Sometimes it really hurts and I have no idea why.

Dr. Barnes: Well, where on your foot does it hurt exactly?

Danny: I'll show you. (he stretches his arm out and points to it) Right here.

Dr. Barnes: Uh...no offence, sir, but that's not your foot. That's your arm.

Danny: Oh my god, you're right!!

Dr. Barnes: Well, it was nice talking to you but I have some other patients to see, so if you'll excuse me.

<Dr. Barnes walks away but Danny starts chasing him>

Danny: Could I at least make an appointment with you to see my foot?

<Danny and Dr. Barnes disappear around the corner and Billy walks into Leslie's room. She's just waking up.>

Billy: Leslie...are you ok?

Leslie: Billy?

Billy: Yeah, it's me.

Leslie: Oh god, Billy, what happened?

Billy: You were shot. And you've been unconscious. But you're awake now.

Leslie: I'm so sorry, Billy. I'm so sorry that I tried to kill you.

Billy: It's ok. Really it is. I forgive you.

Leslie: You do?

Billy: Yeah. I do.

Leslie: Thanks, Billy....

Billy: No problem.

Leslie: So who shot me?

Billy: I did. I'm really sorry. It was an accident.

Leslie: I'm sure it was...After all, I did try to kill you.

Billy: So you're not mad at me?

Leslie: No. After all, I'll be fine. Right?

<Billy doesn't answer.>

Leslie: RIght, Billy? I'll be fine....Billy?

Billy: No, Leslie, you won't be 100% fine.

Leslie: Wh...What do you mean?

Billy: Leslie, I spoke to the doctors...And they said that you'll be....you'll be...

Leslie: What? what? Billy, please tell me.

Billy: They said that you'll be paralyzed.

Leslie: Oh god....no....

Billy: Leslie, I'm so sorry...

Leslie: I can't believe it....

<Leslie starts crying. Billy comes up to her and hugs her.>

Billy: Leslie, please don't cry. Everything will be fine. I promise.

<Leslie continues to cry in Billy's arms. The door opens and Danny comes in.>

Danny: What's going on?

Billy: I told her what the doctor said.

Danny: So how's she doing?

Billy: She's doing fine....how do you think she's doing?

Danny: Wow, for a paralyzed woman she sure looks good.

Leslie: Oh.....

<Leslie starts crying again.>

Billy: Danny, please...

Danny: Gee, I'm sorry....Leslie, I'm sorry. Are you up to answering some questions about the shooting?

Leslie: Yes.

Danny: Do you remember what happened?

Leslie: Yes, I do.

Danny: Tell me about it.

Leslie: Well...Billy and I wanted to have a romantic time together on New Year's Eve, so we went down to the basement....and I was really getting excited about being with Billy again....Billy brought out a bottle of wine, and then....

Danny: What?

Billy: I can tell you what happened.

Danny: No. I need to hear it from Leslie.

Leslie: Well....I wanted to have a drink with Billy, and all of a sudden he pulled a gun on me...

<Billy jumps up.>

Billy: What??? That's not true!!! She pulled the gun on me!!!

Danny: Please, Billy....Leslie, what happened afterwards?

Leslie: Billy told me that he was going to kill because he never really loved me, and he wanted to get rid of me.

Billy: It's a lie. All of it.

Danny: Billy, please. I'm trying to conduct an investigation. Leslie, what happened afterwards?

Leslie: I begged him not to do it...I promised that I'd disappear and never come back....but he didn't want to listen to me...and then....he pulled the trigger and shot me....

Billy: Leslie!!! Please, please....tell him the truth.

Leslie: That is the truth. Everything I just told you.

Danny: Billy...I can't believe you would do this.

Billy: But it's a lie....All of it!!

Danny: Billy come on. We have a motive - you wanted to get revenge on her for the times she tried to kill you. Your fingerprints are all over the weapon. And practically everyone who was at the party heard the shot. Billy, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to take you in.

Billy: But Danny....

Danny: I'm sorry. (takes out the handcuffs) Billy Tate, you're under arrest for the attempted murder of Leslie Walker.

Billy: But I didn't do it! I'm innocent.

Danny: I'm going to read you your rights now. Let's go....Leslie, thanks for the testimony.

Leslie: Just put him away...He's a sick, demented person. Just put him away.

<Danny leads Billy, who is still screaming that he's innocent, out. When they leave, the camera shifts to Leslie and we see her smiling. Fade to black on her smile.>

Dutch: Burt!!

Burt: Dutch....Are you ok?

Dutch: Well, I am in jail for murders that I didn't committ.

Burt: So I guess you're not doing that well.

Dutch: Not really.

Burt: Oh....

Dutch: Burt, what are you doing here?

Burt: I'm here as the new sherriff of Dunn's River.

Dutch: Really? Burt that's great!!!

Burt: Shhh....Shhh....No one is supposed to know. It's a secret.

Dutch: Oh, Burt, you've gotta help me...You have no idea what it's like in here. No privacy, no life, no women...It's awful.

Burt: Look, Dutch, I'm going to do my best to help you. I have a lead. (lowers his voice) I think Ingrid Svenson might be behind this.

Dutch (screaming): Yes!!! That makes sense!!

Burt: Dutch, shhh....Please, you've got to be quiet.

Dutch: Sorry....what about Corinne and Eunice? Where are they?

Burt: Well...they've disappeared. We think that Ingrid kidnapped them.

Dutch: Oh god.... (starts crying) Why them? Why Corinne and Eunice? Why????

Burt: Dutch, please calm down. I need your help or I'll never be able to prove that you're innocent.

Dutch: OK....I'll do anything I can....What can I do?

Burt: We think that a man named Alex may have kidnapped Corinne and Eunice. Have you seen him?

<Burt puts out a photo of Alex in front of Dutch.>

Dutch: Yes, I've seen that man around. We had a few fights in the bar.

Burt: Do you know where he lives?

Dutch: Well, not exactly. But In asked the bartender one night and he said he lived in an apartment building on Wood St.

Burt: OK...Apartment building on Wood St. Now, did he ever say anything suspicious to you or anything like that?

Dutch: Well, one time he tried to kiss me. That was a little suspicious 'cause I think he ain't straight...if you know what I mean...

Burt: No, no, Dutch. I mean, did he do or say anything that showed that he might be in league with Ingrid?

Dutch: Oh...no he didn't.

Burt: Well, this is a good start anyway. I've got to find this guy. I have a feeling the answer lies with him.

Dutch: Burt...please just get me out of here. You do believe I'm innocent, right?

Burt: Yes, I do. You'll be out soon, Dutch. I promise.

Dutch: Thanks, Burt.

<The door opens and a cop comes in.>

Cop: Time's up.

Burt: OK....Dutch, hang in there.

Dutch: I will.

<Burt leaves. Dutch is led out. When they are both gone, the cop picks up the phone and dials.>

Cop: Hey, it's me....they might be on to you....yeah, the good sherriff is down here...no problem. Thought you'd like to know.

<The cop hangs up the phone.>

Benson: You want me to get that?

<The doorbell rings again.>

Benson: You want me to...Oh yeah, they're all gone. Gee, they probably went away just to make me open the door.

<Benson opens the door. Saunders is there.>

Benson: Oh god....Please don't kill me!!! Please!!!

Saunders: Oh, just relax, Benson. This really doesn't become you.

<Saunders walks into the house. Benson closes the door.

Benson: What are you going to do to me?

Saunders: Absolutely nothing.

Benson: Oh god, he's going to kill me. He said he's going to do......absolutely nothing?

Saunders: That's right. I'm not going to do anything to you anymore.

Benson: Really??

Saunders: Yes. I give up.

Benson: Oh, thank you! Thank you! Thank you!!

Saunders: You see, I've just heard what's going on with this family. They have one bumble head convicted of murder in Texas, two daughters looking for him, the son has been arrested for attempted murder, Chester is...well you know, Chester, and Mrs. Tate is chased by two nuts. Boy, what a handful!

Benson: Tell me about it.

Saunders: So I just realized how lucky I am to not be involved. I mean, all this craziness and I'm not involved anymore. Oh, it's so good to be free.

Benson: Boy, am I jealous of you. I'd love to get out.

Saunders: Wanna switch?

Benson: No way!!!

Saunders: Well, Benson, the biggest punishment I could give you for beating me is this. Having you be the Tate butler....for the rest of your life. Ha ha ha ha ha!

Benson: So, what are you going to do?

Saunders: Well, my aunt just died and left me a whole bunch of money. I'm going to spend money like crazy. See you!!

<Saunders turns to leave.>

Benson: Hey Saunders...

Saunders: Yes?

Benson: If you ever need a friend....Well, I'm always here.

Saunders: Well, if you need a friend...I'll be around in Dunn's River.

<Benson extends his hand out. Saunders shakes his hand.>

Saunders: Good luck, Benson.

Benson: You too.

<Saunders leaves the house.>

Benson: Lucky bastard....

<Benson goes back to sweeping the floor.>

Corinne: Boy, this is exhausting.

Eunice: I know. But we're almost done.

Corinne: Any minute and this whole thing will be down.

<Suddenly the door begins to open. Corinne and Eunice stop working immediately and cover the wall. Ingrid walks in.>

Ingrid: Vell, hello.

Eunice: What do you want?

Ingrid: Oh, nothing at all. Yust to let you know to start packing.

Corinne: Packing why?

Ingrid: Vell, because tonight you vill be both be out of here. Ve are moving you.

Corinne: Why?

Ingrid: Because my plan is too far ahead to be ruined now. Get ready. Tonight, you vill be moving. Have a nice day!!!

<Ingrid leaves.>

Eunice: Oh god, Corinne, what will we do?

Corinne: Let's knock down that wall. Maybe we can help from whoever's behind it.

Eunice: You know, I'm still not so sure that there really was somebody there.

Corinne: There was. Trust me! Now move!!

<Eunice and Corinne return to the digging. All of a sudden there is a sound and the whole wall falls down.>

Corinne: We did it!!!

Eunice: I can't believe it worked....Now what do we do?

Corinne: Go find the person who was crying.

<Eunice and Corinne start walking and see a big room that's nicely furnished with a mini kitchen.>

Eunice: And what's this? The V.I.P. suite of the dungeon?

Corinne: I have no idea. Why would Ingrid do this?

Eunice: I don't know.

<All of a sudden Eunice sees an arrow drawn in chalk on the wall.>

Eunice: Corinne! Look!

Corinne: Let's follow that arrow.

<Corinne and Eunice walk until they see a person sitting on the floor, their back turned to them, crying.>

Corinne: Excuse me? We're here to help you. What are you doing here and why are you crying?

<The person turns around. Eunice and Corinne gasp in shock.>

Eunice: Oh my god, Corinne....

<We see the person's face. It's a woman. She looks exactly like Mary Campbell.>

Corinne: Aunt Mary???

<Freeze frame on the woman's face.>